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Adrift

The kick-off in-service day for the school district in which I teach was on Monday.  I might be unusual, but despite my anxiety and reservations about going back to school each year, I actually look forward to hearing the message that is presented on that first day.  It is usually inspirational and ultimately reminds me of why I do what I do and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy about the start of a new year.  Unfortunately, times are a little tough in public education these days, and while I sat eagerly awaiting a morning flooded with inspiration, it only came in spurts and sputters.  There were great moments - a teacher with the message of teaching with passion, phenomenal student performers - but the unfortunate message seemed to be to brace ourselves.  While our district's theme was once "Great Expectations - The Best is Yet to Come," the message we were receiving seemed quite contrary to that.  We are facing some tough times ahead, economically speaking, and that means that changes will come.  I wasn't feeling my usual back to school excitement by the end of the day.

Fortunately, the message was a little brighter on day two of in-service, and I was reminded again of how fortunate I am to be a teacher and teaching in the building that I do, and that things are never as bad as they could be.  The following article was just one of many that we were given as "food for the spirit" and I loved the message, so I am going to share it.  I am not sure of the author, but the title is "Adrift":

In 1982, Steven Callahan was crossing the Atlantic alone in his sailboat when it struck something and sank.  He was out of the shipping lanes and floating in a life raft, alone.  His supplies were few.  His chances were small.  Yet when three fishermen found him seventy-six days later (the longest anyone has survived a shipwreck on a life raft alone), he was alive - much skinnier than he was when he started, but alive.

His account of how he survived is fascinating.  His ingenuity - how he managed to catch fish, how he fixed his solar still (evaporates sea water to make it fresh) - is very interesting.

But the thing that caught my eye was how he managed to keep himself going when all hope seemed lost, when there seemed no point in continuing the struggle, when he was suffering greatly, when his life raft was punctured and after more than a week struggling with his weak body to fix it, it was still leaking air and wearing him out to keep pumping it up.  He was starved.  He was desperately dehydrated.  He was thoroughly exhausted.  Giving up would have seemed to only sane option.

When people survive these kinds of circumstances, they do something with their minds that gives them the courage to keep going.  Many people in similarly desperate circumstances give in or go mad.  Something the survivors do with their thoughts helps them find the guts to carry on in spite of overwhelming odds.

"I tell myself I can handle it," wrote Callahan in his narrative.  "Compared to what others have been through, I'm fortunate.  I tell myself these things over and over, building up fortitude..."

I wrote that down after I read it.  It struck me as something important.  And I've told myself the same thing when my own goals seemed far off or when my problems seemed too overwhelming.  And every time I've said it, I have always come back to my senses.

The truth is, our circumstances are only bad compared to something better.  But others have been through much worse.  I've read enough history to know you and I are lucky to be where we are, when we are, no matter how bad it seems to us compared to our fantasies.  It's a sane thought and worth thinking.

So here, coming to us from the extreme edge of survival, are words that can give us strength.  Whatever you're going through, tell yourself you can handle it.  Compared to what others have been through, you're fortunate.  Tell this to yourself over and over, and it will help you get through the rough spots with a little more fortitude. 

Retrospective summer bucket list

At the beginning of the summer, several of my friends created "summer bucket lists" and posted them online.  I absolutely loved the idea.  I also recognized that making one would probably make me crazy.  When I have a to-do list, or a running plan, or things marked on the calendar (or sometimes even just on the calendar in my head), it somehow becomes a crime if I don't get those things accomplished.  A bucket list, I was afraid, would take the fun things we do in the summer and turn them into tasks that I had to accomplish.  While this would clearly not be the case for most, I have never claimed to be normal.  That said, in hindsight, my bucket list may have looked something like this:

• Go camping
• Go to the museum
• Play at the park
• Catch lightning bugs
• Watch fireworks
• Learn to swim
• Pick strawberries on the farm
• Run around barefoot
• Ride a golf cart
• Play in the surf
• Build a sandcastle
• Watch the sunrise
• Watch the sunset
• Take a walk in the woods
• Have a playdate with new friends
• Have a playdate with old friends
• Go to the science center
• Learn to pump on the swings
• Visit a state park
• See a drive-in movie
• Learn to tie shoes
• Play frisbee
• Visit an animal park
• Learn about money
• Go to Idlewild
• Make s'mores over a fire
• Make a volcano
• Get a family picture taken
• Read a lot of books
• Ride bikes
• Taste cotton candy
• Eat fresh blackberries right from the bush
• Visit a friend in another state
• Go to the movies in a theater
• Have a sleepover
• Count by fives and tens
• Get faces painted
• Watch the Olympics
• Make cookies
• Go to a county fair
• Catch a fish
• Go down a Slip 'n Slide
• Make sidewalk chalk art
• Blow bubbles
• Blow kisses

I am happy to say that nearly every one of these things happened.
Though, we did just buy velcro shoes.

This is it

I wish there were some feature of this blog that would allow me to go directly from thoughts to print.  I could write a serious post while running ten miles.  Or even five miles.  And I have a ton to write about. 

But alas, the time I have spent running is without that ability, and while I do think of what I would write, I never really get figured out when I would write it.  And so I am stuck writing this twelve sentence post and calling it a night. 

School starts tomorrow.  I am sad to see summer end; it has been a ton of fun.  I am experiencing my usual back to school anxiety, my anxiety largely to do with time.  It is stressful to think about all I will have to cram in the evening and weekend hours, from grocery shopping to grading papers to spending quality time with my family to exercising.  But, as usual, we will find our groove.  I am lucky to have summer; I do not take it for granted one bit. 

The Parents' Pledge

As I was gathering the recycling to take to the curb this evening, I came across the April 2012 edition of Parents Magazine.  After months of it sitting around and me reading it bit by bit, here and there, it was time to get it out of the house.  But there was actually a reason that I hadn't tossed it already: on the inside of the cover was something they called "The Parents Pledge."  I have read it several times over the months since receiving the magazine in the mail, and despite the fact that it can be found at www.parents.com/lifetime-learning-pledge, I decided that I wanted to record it here in hopes that I will come to it again and remind myself of this pledge every now and then.  I really appreciate and enjoy the message it sends.  And it always helps to be reminded of these things.

The Parents Pledge

To help my kids develop a love of learning that will last a lifetime, I promise to:

encourage independent play
I'll give them the time and space to experiment and learn things on their own.  And if they get frustrated, I'll greet them with guidance, not answers.

hit the books
I'll read to my kids every day - even once they're old enough to do it by themselves.

nurture their natural curiosity
While a preschooler's nonstop questions can be wearying, I'll always try to respond with enthusiasm.

give them a game plan
If they're struggling with a task, I'll break it down into simple steps.

embrace setbacks
It's my job to recast disappointments as a chance to improve, and I'll inspire my kids to keep trying.

compliment them the right way
I'll be specific when doling out praise and focus on tier effort rather than the results.  Excessive ooh-ing and aah-ing can dampen their motivation.

support special interests
I'll help my kids find a passion or a hobby by exposing then to lots of things and by visiting museums, libraries, and historic places.

create little challenges
Asking how many red cars they can spot or how to spell a simple word will boost their sense of competence.  Plus it's fun.

practice the things I preach
They'll care more about academics if they see me reading for pleasure, calculating our budget, and researching a new subject on my own time.

tolerate messes
Learning isn't always neat and orderly.  A little chaos is a vital part of the process.

be my kids' top learning advocate
Whether they have problems with a homework project or simply need a pep talk, I'll strive to be as supportive as I can be.

Source:  Parent's  magazine, April 2012, inside cover.

How the dentist's fish was named

I was standing by the receptionists' desk discussing our next dental appointment date when Everly walked over and noticed the fish that they had swimming in a glass vase under the roots of a water-fed plant.  The curve of the glass distorted the image, leading Everly to comment on the large size of the fish.  I explained that the fish was actually the same kind of fish as hers, and that it was probably about the same size.  "But theirs is orange and mine is blue," she noted.  Yes, that's right.

We sat down to wait for our much anticipated appointment, but the fish was still on Ev's mind.  "What's their fish's name?" she inquired.  After telling her I didn't know, she decided that we should ask.  I told her that she was welcome to, and to my surprise, she said, "OK!"  I lifted her up just as the hygienist walked over to let us know that our time had arrived to head back for our appointment. 

"Everly has a question for you, if you don't mind."

The hygienist looked at her and without further prompting, Everly confidently asked, "What is your fish's name?"

The hygienist looked at her and said, "You know what?  We don't have a name for our fish!  Would you like to name it?"

Everly didn't hesitate. "Well, my fish's name is Dora," she said. "So, I think maybe your fish should be Boots."

I was kind of impressed, and the glance that the hygienist gave me told me that she was kind of impressed, as well.  She said to Everly, "That is a perfect name for him.  Boots it is!"  Everly proudly smiled.  And I proudly smiled.

On the way out after a great appointment, the receptionists thanked her for naming their fish, and Everly responded with a confident, "You're welcome!"  And it is that confidence that caught my attention and gave me a glimpse into the future.

I loved what I saw.

Story Time

I asked Everly if she would like to tell me a story about vacation.  She said no.  She wanted to tell me a story about a panda.  Here it is, followed by the rest of the conversation that ensued (I typed while we talked):

Everly: A panda came to life then played with his bea(r) friends.  Then the beas went to his house.  Then, um, the beas eat with him.  Then the bea went to somebody's house then that bea comed too!  Then they have a seepova!!  Then they, um, I forget the rest of my gory (story). 
(pause)
Then, they all lived together!!  They all live together now.  They all live together now.

THEN, um, their mom came.  Then they went to a gore (store)!

(To me): Did you already get they went to some body's house?

Me: Yes. I got that.

Everly: Then they, they, they went to anotha house.  They went to anotha house, mommy.  They just went to anotha house.

Me: Ok...

Everly: Then, they went to sim (swim) at somebody's house.  Then they said, "What's your name?  Your puppy's name and your name and your baby's name?"  My baby's name is Rea. 

Then, her name was, um...

Cortlan (chiming in): Julia.

Everly: Julia.  Then the puppy's name was...

Cortlan: Indigo.

Everly: Indigo. 

The end!  That's all my gory!  Isn't that a long gory?  It's done!!

Me: Nice! Now, can you tell me something about vacation that you remember?

Everly: Um. I don't know.

Me: What did you do?

Everly: Kickin board!!

Me: And?

Everly: Swimming! And watching a movie!

Me: What was your favorite part? 

Everly: Watching a movie! 

Me: Seriously?  That was your favorite part? We watched a movie the last thing while the cars were being backed to go home.  And that was your favorite part?

Everly: (reconsidering) No. Getting glow sticks.

Me:  That happened at the very end, too.  What about the rest of the week? 

Everly: I liked swimming.

Me: Do want to tell a story about when you were swimming?

Everly: No.

Me: Do you want to tell me about the turtle hospital?

Cortlan (chiming in, again): That was my favorite part.

Everly (very much wanting to be liker her brother): Mine, too!

Cortlan: Some of the turtles names: Boater.  He got hit by a boat. Uhhh...What are the rest of their names?

Me: I think there was Lolly, right?

Cortlan: Yeah.  I don't know a lot about him.  Or is that a girl?  Is that the blind one?

Me: No, I think Lolly is the girl, and not the blind one.  What else? 

Cortlan: The blind one.

Me: What about the blind one? 

Cortlan: The blind one is blind.  What's his name? 

Me: I don't remember. 

Cortlan: Then, well.  One of the turtles got hit by the boat's propeller.  One of the turtles was blind.  One lost one flipper.

Me: Ok.  Anything else?

Cortlan: Can I tell a story?

Me: Sure.

Cortlan: Once upon a time, there was a turtle. He had a huge family and....(giggling, because he is about to say the same thing that Everly did when telling her story) I forget the rest of my story. And. And. And. And they all went home. And then they went to a motorcycle shop and then they all went to their grandma's house and then they saw the new pool.  (very much wanting the same attention as his sister) Did you get that mommy?

Me:  I got it.

Cortlan: Can you type that part?

Me:  I did.

Cortlan : And then they flew up on a magic carpet all the way up to the sky. Then they saw a magic genie lamp and they picked it up and flew all the way back down. Then they shaked the lamp and then a huge genie came out. And then on the magic carpet, they said "Fly, magic carpet, fly!" and that's how they got back home. They said all of their names and they said, "Star light. Is it bright? I wish that I had a fairy tonight." The end.

Gotta love story time with a three and five year old.